A Most Unusual Deity

Today Matt and I experienced a god that I feel certain both of our dads would have loved: Maximón*, the cigarette smoking, booze swigging Mayan deity.

Maximón and his Buzzed Keepers

We are on Lake Atitlán, Guatemala, which is an amazing place due to the surrounding volcanoes and chill vibe. Our hotel is near Santiago, the largest town on the lake, and we walked along the local paths to get there. This was an experience in and of itself as we passed tiny garden after tiny garden, evidence of the locals scratching out a sustenance existence. Everyone who passed us greeted us warmly and with a smile.

We hit the town and after a few minutes of browsing the amazing handicraft shops, we were accosted by a “guide” who offered to show us the various sites. We had heard of Maximón and knew the experience would be easier with a guide, particularly because many people in this area speak Tzu’tujil and not Spanish, so we agreed to pay an overpriced, gringo rip off price for a tour with Francisco. We set off winding through back alleys farther and farther off the tourist path. I was having flashbacks to a horrible “tour” in Morocco that ended with my friend and me locked in a rug shop, when we suddenly arrived at a nondescript private residence that is Maximón’s current abode.

We entered and were met by a smoking Maximón, with his two handlers flanking him and candles on the floor in front of him. We paid a gratuity and photograph fee (about $15 total). These offerings were accepted and secured on the top of a stack of bills beneath Maximón’s tie. We hovered awkwardly in the small room and looked around, trying not to gawk. The room was crammed with Catholic artifacts – saints lined the perimeter, all dressed with ties or scarves and a large prone adult Jesus was swaddled in a case, draped with flashing lights and honored with lit candles in front of him. There were benches around the room with males ranging from preteens to old sitting around in various states of drowsy intoxication. After a few minutes, a place in front of Maximón opened up and we snagged prime seats to observe the action. Maximón moves every year, and it is a great honor to have him in your home. Francisco explained that the current homeowner of Maximón’s shrine chooses the house for the next year. There are 24 shaman each year: 12 men and 12 women. They each conduct different types of ceremonies and select their successors for the next year. At night Maximón is put to bed in the rafters.

We had arrived during a ceremony, so a shaman was seated on a plastic crate in front of Maximón. He was praying in Tzu’tujil, but there didn’t seem to be urgency to the matter. Sometimes the shaman would indicate that it was time to buy more beer and a bill would be taken from Maximón’s stash and a boy sent to buy a bottle, which was shared with many of those present. At one point, a fire truck passed with its siren blaring. This generated great excitement and broke the moment as the crowd speculated as to what had occurred. Some of the younger boys and men rushed out to investigate and returned with the full report of a car accident. Occasionally the shaman would indicate that the handlers needed to serve some liquor to Maximón and they would carefully remove the cigarette and pour booze into his mouth, dabbing his lips with a towel. The cigarette was otherwise a perpetual fixture and the handlers carefully tapped ash into one ceramic bowl and collected spent butts in another. In front of Maximón was a wooden structure and these ceramic bowls were placed in their wooden holders while additional niches held a pack of cigarettes and a bottle of liquor.

There was a point where I wondered whether this was all an elaborate hoax on the tourists. It seemed so surreal to have a cigarette smoking, booze swilling god (or saint as he is sometimes referred to). The origins of Maximón are somewhat obscure, but he predates the conquistadors and Santiago’s first Catholic church, whose building began in 1545. As in most Latin American countries, while the Catholic church did its best to convert the locals, they often retained their own traditions and merged them with Catholic beliefs and rituals. That is why it makes perfect sense to have Maximón surrounded by Catholic saints and Jesus. The belief in Maximón is as real as the belief in Jesus or any saint.

About 20 minutes after we arrived, there was a changing of the shaman and the first shaman gave up his seat as the second shaman began setting up. First, one of the young men (not Maximón’s handlers) tidied up all of the candles in front of both Maximón and Jesus and scraped up the wax that had pooled on the floor. Then the new shaman spent about 5 minutes carefully setting up the thin white and orange tapers in two rows in front of Maximón and one row in front of Jesus. Next, a woman who was the person receiving the shaman’s intercession for her health was seated on the plastic crate in front of Maximón. The shaman began pulling clothes out of a chest and purifying them with incense. He dressed the woman in two shirts, a suit coat, a blanket for around her legs, shoes and one of the two hats and scarves originally on Maximón when we arrived. Then the young man spent about 5 minutes waving incense around the small room. At one point it was handed to the handlers and they each waved it under their armpits, which probably was just good manners at that point.

The ceremony began in Spanish and I recognized an Our Father, Glory Be and Hail Mary. I wondered whether we were going to recite the rosary when the shaman transitioned into Tzu’tujil. At that point we had spent about 40 minutes with Maximón and decided to take our leave. We walked with Francisco to the first Cathedral, and were amused to note that Maximón has a domed shrine kitty corner from the church and spends a night there between his annual move. We then hiked to the other end of town to a pleasant overlook and a very sad “peace park” which is actually a memorial to 13 locals who were massacred by the military government on December 2, 1990, during the last chapter of Guatemala’s civil war, which targeted the Mayan people and left 200,000 dead.

After some shenanigans with Francisco over the bill, we left him and walked back through town and to our hotel where we lounged for the rest of the afternoon and evening and contemplated the mysterious Maximón.

Cocktails by the Pool

* Pronounced “mah-shi-mo”

Wining Part II – Colchagua Valley, Chile

We left Mendoza and flew to Santiago, Chile, where we had an afternoon and evening before being picked up by our guide, Pablo, and driven to the Colchagua Valley for more wine tasting. We saw very little of Santiago, but it felt like any other large city in a Western country. So similar that I had flashbacks when we stopped at the Starbucks in the morning to get a muffin before hitting the road and I saw all the businessmen (yes, only men) in suits having meetings or on their laptops. I don’t miss that life!

We did have time in Santiago for two very nice meals. The first was lunch at Bar Liguria. We got a bit confused walking there and I finally stopped and asked a friendly-looking woman where it was. She was so friendly that she walked us there. She wanted to practice her English, and I happily obliged. Who said city dwellers are unfriendly? We sat outside at the restaurant and had a lovely meal, despite some issues trying to translate the menu. Food terms are so regional that our Peruvian knowledge was no help beyond the basics. Beth and Chris have this amazing app that translates text before your eyes that we were using until we were informed the restaurant has a no cell phone policy. Oops! I explained we were just translating the menu and the waitress sent over a waiter who spoke some English, so we could put the phone away. After walking around a bit and then relaxing for a few hours at our hotel, we had dinner at Aquí Está Coco, a renowned seafood restaurant. The decor and ambience were great – in particular the restroom sinks made out of tree trunks – and the food was good. As it was a Tuesday night, the place lacked energy and the vibe seemed a bit focused on clearing the joint so the staff could go home. But we had a good meal nonetheless.

Pablo, the owner of Grado Sur Expediciones, picked us up on Wednesday morning and we headed to the countryside. Pablo was great – fun, interesting, and spoke perfect English, an added bonus. His company handles more active tours, such as mountain biking and kayaking, and our ride reflected it.

No need for the kayak/bike rack on this trip! But we were comfortable and it was good for the mountain roads (and our luggage). Pablo said that some of the nicer hotels give him the stink eye when he pulls up to collect guests, so we met him in the service drive at The W.

The fall colors in the Colchagua Valley were at their peak and grapes were still being harvested, so the valley was stunning. First stop was lunch at Viu Manent. Wow – the setting, the food, the wine, the service – everything was absolutely perfect.  We each ordered a different glass of wine and passed them around to have our own tasting. We didn’t tour the winery, but if I were ever in the area again I would definitely do the tour (complete with horse-drawn carriage) and have another meal there. Part of the attraction of the meal was that we were not limited to a set menu, as on our Mendoza tours, so we could have exactly what we wanted and each dish was a winner.

Second stop was the Laura Hartwig winery. Our tour was very nice, but we, and Beth in particular, were turned off by the winery’s label –  a prim picture of the now 83-year-old Laura back in the 50s. Very old-fashioned and it made us feel we were drinking wine with a aura of disapproval hanging over us. Really, check out her picture on the website and tell me if you think they could use a better marketing campaign! http://www.laurahartwig.cl/default.asp?id=52&ids=65. It was cool to see the barrels being filled and because our guide was so nice we bought a bottle of wine for us to drink with dinner that night.

Our final stop was Museo Colchagua, our only museum of the trip. It was quite interesting, with exhibits ranging from fossils to pre-Colombian artifacts to steam engines to the Chilean mine rescue in 2010, complete with the drill bits they used to drill the escape passage and the capsule that freed the miners. Had we not imbibed generous amounts of wine, we likely would have appreciated it a bit more. We decided on a simple meal that evening and bought cold cuts, cheese and a frozen pizza to have for dinner at our quaint inn, Posada Colchagua. The proprietess was very sweet and opened up her kitchen for us and offered us  bottle of wine. We were so over-wined, that we had to decline.

Day two started with a 2 hour drive through the mountains, instead of the 20 minute direct route to Viña Santa Cruz. For the record, I voted against it as I despise car rides, but I must admit that the views were impressive despite the fog. Even more impressive was the view from Viña Santa Cruz overlooking its vineyards.

Our guide described Viña Santa Cruz as a tourism winery and that was certainly true. We took a gondola to the top of the estate where there were three mini museums, each devoted to a different indigenous Chilean culture: Mapuche, Aymara and Rapa Nui (Easter Island). It was very interesting and Pablo was an informative guide. His descriptions made all of us want to visit Easter Island.

After we descended our tour began and that is when it became apparent that wine is not the focus at Viña Santa Cruz. Our guide was impersonal and pedantic: he would ask us a question and stare at us until someone would venture a response. Usually he would tell us we were wrong with a curt “No!” I felt like I was in junior high and hadn’t studied for a quiz. Despite the $30 per person cost of the tour, we were only allowed to taste the cheapest wines they make. Pablo knew something was up when we left without buying a single bottle of wine.

We had lunch in Lolol, Pablo’s hometown, at a lovely local restaurant. We walked down the main street in the town and saw where the homes were destroyed from the earthquake in 2010. Much devastation and the rebuilding process is slow due to a lack of funds.

Lolol

Lolol

After lunch we went to Mont Gras for a tasting instead of a full tour. Our host Marcelo was animated and very generous with the pours, which included all the different price points of the wines. It definitely made up for our bad experience at Viña Santa Cruz and we bought wine to prove it!

We headed into Santa Cruz where Beth and I walked around the market, yep, just like everywhere else, while the guys had a drink. Afterwards we headed to dinner at the lovely Vino Bello. Good wines, Italian food and service made for a great last dinner together.

Our last day together started with some excitement – an earthquake measuring 4.7 on the Richter Scale shortly after we arose. Matt and I had never experienced an earthquake before so we were a bit freaked out, particularly after visiting Lolol the prior day. To me it felt like a truck hit the building and then 4 waves came through that rocked me simultaneously up and down and back and forth. Very odd sensation. We found out later that an earthquake that small isn’t considered anything by those who live in the area and Chris, who lived in California as a kid, didn’t even notice it!

We went to the swanky Lapostolle Clos Apalta winery for our only tour of the day. The owner is the great-granddaughter of the creator of Grand Marnier and it was impressive to see what old money and a good distribution system can do for a winery! The winery is organic and biodynamic, the latter of which I don’t totally understand but it includes elements of mysticism, moon cycles and the like. The winery is intended to look like a nest perched in the mountains and it uses gravity (something we also saw in wineries in Spain) as the force to create its wines, with the wines moving down 6 stories during the process instead of being machine moved. The winery was impressive, as it should be given the US $10 million price tag. It was an excellent final tour for our trip.

But just because our tours were over didn’t mean our wine shopping was! We stopped at the Montes winery for our version of a tasting (ordering wines and sharing) and a snack. It was another lovely winery; the staff was friendly and the wines were good.

It was also interesting to see the fields being harvested. I made the mistake of saying “oh, those poor workers,” when I meant poor because they were engaged in back-breaking work while we were drinking, but I was mocked endlessly. Pablo’s brothers’ business is supplying the harvesters for the vineyards. We suggested they should also provide a wine shipping service as this was not available in the area as it had been in Mendoza.

Our final winery stop was Las Niñas, a winery owned by 3 generations of women, for the express purpose of buying their “high heel” wine per Pablo’s suggestion. Unfortunately, we learned that they had relabeled the wine because they felt it was too feminine and not doing well in the market. Clearly they were not shipping to the US where novelty labels fly off the shelves, particularly if the wine is good! Our final stop before the airport was a quaint restaurant where we had the best empanadas ever and sopapillas (fried dough) with honey for dessert.

We had just enough time to get Beth and Chris to the airport for their flight. Then Matt and I collapsed for the night – no dinner and no wine – before we returned to Peru the next morning. All in all, an amazing trip. Most importantly, all 5 1/2 bottles made it safely home! photo 2